Yesterday's Jam

Scene 7

Roy: I mean, what good are you? You obviously don't know anything about computers.

Jen: No. But okay. But I can learn. You know, I mean. For example, Moss, you could take me through what you're doing right now.

Moss: I'd be delighted. I'm just working on a very simple piece of programming code.

(white noise)

Jen: Oh, I see. Oh God, no I'm lying again I didn't understand any of that, I don't know anything about computers. I mean, I'm absolutely useless to you I might as well pack up and go home.

(Jen goes into her office)

(Laura knocks and enters)

Laura: Hi. Is, Roy around?

Roy: Hello there little lady. Are you lost? How can I help you? I'm Roy.

(Laura knees him in the bollocks and proceeds to beat him senseless)

Well here I am!

Roy: Not the face! Not the face!

(Laura takes off one of her Manolo Blahniks and beats Roy with it)

Laura: Yeah well, maybe this'll teach you to treat people with a little bit of respect.

Roy: Is it 'cos we spoke on the phone earlier?

Jen: Oh my God. Are those Manolo's?

Laura: Oh, yes.

Jen: They are gorgeous. Were they expensive?

Laura: No, no, no. Got them in the sale.

Jen: Oh God, clever you. I'm never lucky enough to get a bargain like that.

Laura: Well, I should take you shopping.

Jen Yeah, no that would be fantastic. Yeah, nice to meet you.

Roy: Nice meeting you.

Moss: Chairman wow! You've just diffused that entire situation.

Jen: What situation? Oh that, yeah. Oh my God, does that happen a lot?

Moss: They're fairly regular the beatings, yes. I'd say we're on a bi-weekly beating.

Roy: Oh it's not all that bad.

Moss: Come on Roy, it's pretty bad.

Jen: Maybe I could help with this, you know, I mean, I'm a people person, and people like you need a person to deal with people; a people person like me. Oh my God. Ideas are coming, things are happening here. Okay, okay. What would you say, yeah, if I told you I had a plan to raise your profile upstairs by 100%. What would you say?

Moss: It can't be done. You're crazy.

Jen: What would you say Roy? Roy's passed out. Okay, I need a felt tipped pen, and some paper.

(cue A Team theme)

Scene: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9


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